I guess it's due time for a year with resolutions. I haven't made resolutions in a really really long time. I've never been the type to follow suit and the molds of society. But seeing as how I happen to be in a pensive mood for thought right now, here goes?
By the by, I have yet to mention my positive outlook for this new year. I have this great feeling that it's going to be a fantastic year. 2010 was an amazing year, but this one- I have a feeling will be even better. Anyway,
1. Stop blacking out when drinking.
2. Do better and stop being such chicken shit about everything.
3. Be better- as a person.
4. Clean up my act- career-wise.
5. Actually begin to work on the strengthening of my Mandarin reading and writing skills. Along with my proficiency with Spanish.
6. Better money management. Save more.
7. Stop fucking shit up on purpose- relationships with people. Stop picking fights with friends for no reason just because I'm sick of routine.
8. Work harder.
9. Play less. Drink less.
10. Stop coming home when the sun comes up.
11. Keep trying to love myself more.
12. Stop picking fights with friends for no reason just because I'm sick of routine.
13. Get healthy.
14. Stop pushing people away and running them off. (Okay, we'll see about this one)
15. Forgive myself for all the things that haunt me. Forgive myself more. Be less critical and hard on myself.
16. Actually let myself fall in love- let myself open up. (Okay, we'll see about the opening up part on this one)
17. Write more poetry.
18. Have more patience.
19. Be more cautious.
20. Survive.
Think I'm biting off more than I can chew? Maybe. But most of things aren't resolutions, just ever-present self improvement projects for life. So yep, we shall see.
Oh, and I think it might be time for me to find a new heading because I'm not a smoker anymore. I know, big shocker. I now only smoke when I drink and even so it's only a few drags of a cigarette and never more than that. Also, I realized that I am definitely not as brave as I used to be or as I should be when it comes to certain things and that the heading needs to be changed to a more well suited one because I have changed. So that will be happening quite soon once the right inspiration and discovery strikes.
Spotlight
- mynameisjane
- hi, with warning. i am entirely damaged and crazy with masochistic tendencies and an addictive self-destructive personality. but i am in the trials of self-recovery- though thoroughly failing in the process, here's to hoping- one day- someday. in form of pure tried articulation of the written word, this space keeps the highly erratic and darkly emotional self reflection of my contemplative life with bits of sunshine scattered in between. i am a mess; i absolutely create disasters and inevitably fuck everything up. so decide if you are one who actually thinks and chooses for his own mind or one who is fated to predestined cowardice, forever running away like the rest of the narrow minded sheep in this world and unable to embrace the violent and bittersweet storm of harsh realness.
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