Song Love

"If you wanted to work it out, why'd you lock the door.."

I wish

I could die. Please. Please.

Dead; Catatonic

I wish I were dead. I can't live in this unbelievably cruel world. I wish I had brought my knife.
I don't have anyone. You'll never understand.

Blood

You should've protected me better. You all should have. You should have all done better.

I should have been protected instead.

Hard To Get Out Of Bed

I need a cigarette.
And to realize again that I'm crazy and that we are no long a part of eachothers lives. And it was never me. And you never felt that way. You just screwed me up by leading me on, by just being you. You're not a bad guy, if you were that would make it easier to dismiss you. Story of my fucked life.

I don't know how I let these memories creep up in me, fucking dreams man. I hate memories, just the thought of thrm make you relive everything you ever wished to forget.

Dreams

Just woke up. Haven't thought about you in a long time, Stephen. Yet, every time I do, it's nothing but the ache of what could've and what should've been.

It was supposed to be me. You and me, and real love. Now it'll always just remain, the one who got away. I guess I still can't convince myself that you really just didn't want me, none of your actions added up. That connection just  doesn't add up to not love.

I haven't thought of you in a long time, and no matter how much we hurt each other, I still love you. I guess I always will.
It should've been us. But I guess life doesn't give us broken people that much luck. Or at least one of us.

So I guess the memory of you will have to be buried away again until the next time my random subconscious chooses to have you submerge again for no reason at all. But nobody can say that I didn't try.