Ouch

So yeah, apparently it still hurts. More so at certain times than other times. Supersucks. I hate it. One little thing and it'll ache. How dumb right?

I think about (though I try not to when I start, I try to push it out of my mind) when I see you again, how it'll be and how if or when you begin to want me again because I'm sure it'll happen inevitably given the circumstances, how I'll either give in and then purposely try to use you then discard you shamelessly, or just completely reject you no matter how hard I want to do the very opposite. I also fantasize about me meeting someone new right in front of you and what your reaction would be. Why is it that we can never help but hope -against all logic for something better? It's because we have to, or else what else keeps us from continuing to live our lives with purpose?

You don't fall out of love until you fall back into love. I need to find a new distraction..

Side note*
There are topics up for discussion that I would like to circumvent, but as I have stated, I haven't been up for much at the moment to be able to muster up the motivation to actually hash over the workings in my brain. So for now my thoughts are put on hold.