Alright, Story Time

Okay, so I never realized just how much of a girl I really was, or am for the matter. And it just hit me. Right. Freaking. Now. I can't tell you that I am not completely astounded by this new found revelation. My entire life I have been the tomboy. You know, the girl who plays and runs with all of the boys and of whom all the other girls hate. The mischievous tomboy who ran around in tights and dresses until she could dress herself and the one who always ended up accidentally breaking something if ever I crossed a path. And even to this day my main color groups are black, gray, blue, white, and now within the past year recent additions of dark green and red. (still, no flowers, ribbons, bows, frills, blehhhh- though sparkle shimmer is okay, I do love my shimmery make up- but hey that's a different subject) I am completely a romanticist (and hopeless romantic at that). I am genuinely a full on feminine female who appreciates all the perks a girly girl receives- you know, the pampering and what not, yet unfortunately I don't get that often ever (what is it with guys who do not prefer an independent girl?). I mean I am obviously still one of the guys at times (tough, hard, bold, adventurous, outspoken, all too mischievous, mellow, etc.) but most of the time, though most people never get to see it because I don't like to let people see the side, I am really soft. Softhearted, shy, and then some. And I've never really fully realized it and analyzed that part about myself until now. Until these past couple of weeks where I have begun to fully embrace my femininity. The funny thing is that what I have tried so hard to hide, people I choose to keep in my life of whom I have underestimated, these friends have begun to see the real me and actually prefer the softer side. But hey, self preservation is a bitch and everything works out in due time. Anyway, so I used to reject girly stuff, and at times I still do- you know the girly girly stuff like too high maintenance and fussy. I still probably will always be down to earth and the one who gets along with most people except those bitchy and whiny girls. I guess this whole past year of me being a late bloomer and finally embracing my feminine qualities has finally worked it's duty on me to help me further come into my own to understand who I am more and who I am becoming. I really do not mind at all being more of a girly girl now. In fact, I really rather love it. I guess this is what happens as you grow older. It is true, you more and more become who you're supposed to or meant to be, but also growth and development is an ongoing life process that never ends. We never know what will happen or how things will end, but you have to admit, the ride sure is fun and exhilarating while it lasts.