Happy Mother's Day? Not.

Once again my brother never ceases to change and emerge out of his very much jaded world. Once again he has managed to completely ruin my day with his stubborn and impossible male chauvinistic demeanor. I say something lightly in response in hopes of his realized understanding as he has once again jabbed a low blow as a mechanism for his underdeveloped mentality of skewed perception towards life. I say something lightly, hoping that this is the chance where he can try to understand, and he completely gets all defensive and blows up while refusing to understand where I am coming from and refusing to understand myself as a person and who I have grown into just because I do happen to be 5 years younger. (As all ignorant and incorrigible men do which ceases their productivity in mental growth for their own great potential person) What is with people with those superiority complexes when it comes to age. What is wrong with people who are so close-minded they can't see beyond their own noses? Age does not necessarily mean wisdom. It all depends on the rate one grows internally and the experiences life happens to throw at a person.

Don't get me wrong, I am not saying I am perfect, for I am so entirely far from it. I am filled with flaws and am an immensely imperfect person. But I do internally strive to become a better person with each day that passes and try to remain open-minded. I am after all a strong believer in Existentialism. I don't know, maybe it's easier for me to do so because I have always been on the other end, so I try to give people the benefit of the doubt because I can relate. I don't know, it's quite simple. Treat others as you would like to be treated. How hard is it to have compassion and empathy for other without compromising one's own integrity? I hate how I am just so empathetic and become so affected by the vices and follies of others who are so close-minded. I care for their own well-being as a person because in truth, they can be so much better than that. Whatever may be the cause, and however much I become hurt, I still can't shake my faith in mankind. I hate that I care so much and become so bothered by people all over who are just so utterly awful without conscience and filled with such low morale.

So thus I have retreated to the sanctuary of my room feeling utterly shitty and quite exhausted for the constant mental beatings I have taken that have stacked up all too quickly and messily throughout my mere 21 years.

I just feel really bad for my mother because I love her so much and this is supposed to be her day. And the irresolvable issues between my close-minded brother and I have managed to ruin it for her.

Happy Mother's Day mother, I love you forever.