Another Go

Okay so I've speculated about this topic before, and I suppose that I will continuously remain to do so until I fall into the menopausal category.

I really really really hate how as a female grows older, the hormone fluctuations and PMS intensifies. I mean I really hate how idiot males at many times will resort to being inconsiderate, immature, and ignorant to label a woman's behavior on PMS as a means to blame any inconsistency that is the slightest bit unpleasant to them because they themselves cannot hack it when times it rough. It's so utterly stupid.

But to be honest, us girls often do not have control over how we feel because our cycles often are immersed in fluctuating hormones in our cyclic patterns. It's obvious that males do not understand this or cannot even begin to comprehend this situation because they have just been so lucky as to have been biologically given a steady stream of hormones that, if I may say so, are the very opposite of female cycles.

The point is, I always know just when I am about to be bestowed my monthly gift or curse however you choose to label it. I always know because the previous week before (that's 7 days), I always get irritated by the slightest bit of ANYTHING. Seriously, ANYTHING will just turn me into a dark mood that is completely annoyed by anything and everything. Often times I feel bad for the people who have to put up with it, especially my parents. I feel especially bad for my parents because they are the people I use my powers of tolerance on a daily basis who I cannot block out of my life as I do with everyone else I choose to filter out out of my own preference. And so when my PMS starts to work its magic on me, sometimes it is so hard to play the dutiful daughter role and be silent while taking their constant nagging and criticism. And sometimes I do guiltily blow up from time to time while feeling terrible about it after. But it happens and you move on.

I just really hate it. I mean it is worse enough having a cycle that continuously fluctuates and tries to re-balance itself. And once is gets back to balance, it only changes again. I mean, us girls can't catch a friggen break! I mean it is slightly comedic as I cannot believe I am discussing this subject and it is almost ridiculous, but I really do hate how inconsistent it makes me. It fucks with our minds and emotions.

I mean, I am already inconsistent enough as it is. And this only makes me crazier. Perfect right? Not really.

I don't even know what I am talking about and this entry seriously lacks its luster and my usual standard of okay after much scrutiny. I guess I haven't really had the privilege of being enlightened much lately or have been lucky enough to come across some sort of transcendence. Truth be told, I have been feeling rather grey lately. Blah.